After inventing facts with glee in More Information Than You Require, actor-comedian John Hodgman found himself in his forties, those years when men must stop pretending to be the children of bright potential they were and settle into the failing bodies of the weird dads that they are. In this Winner of the New England Book Award, Hodgman collects his real-life wanderings through the hills of Western Massachusetts where he spent his youth and the dangerous beaches of Maine. Self-deprecating and hilarious, Hodgman discovers the horror of freshwater clams, the evolutionary purpose of the mustache, and which animals to keep as pets and which to kill with traps and poison. Here too is Hodgman's advice on what to do when the people of coastal Maine try to sacrifice you to their strange god.